For real. I know everyone feels the need to tell you you are unhealthy and need to lose weight. Well, DUH! But the thing they don't understand is just saying, "You're fat! Do something about it!" just makes us feel worse when we fail. You will be ready for a lifestyle change when you are ready. Now, that doesn't mean you can use it as an excuse. None of this "I'm not ready to lose weight..." But the decision to change your life can't be forced on you. Only you can make this decision. And sometimes that's taking small steps and sometimes that means making a huge change quickly, but only you know when it is time.
So in the meantime, I want you to think about something. I want you to think about everything about you and your life that has nothing to do with being fat. Are you a good friend? Good wife? Are you funny? Do you have a nice laugh? Are you generous? Think about those things and KNOW that the fat does not define you. No matter how people on the outside may judge you by your physical appearance, YOU shouldn't. Right now, being fat is a part of who you are, that is just a reality. But it does not define you. But you have to accept that it is a part of you, and the sooner you can accept that, the sooner you can make the change to NOT be fat anymore.
No matter how many people may say "Do not accept being fat!" you must remember that SHAME and SELF HATE will get you NOWHERE. Even if you lose weight, do you think you will magically love yourself just because you are skinny? NO. Accepting who you are, no matter what size, HAS to come first.
And right now, that means accept that you are fat, but have the confidence in yourself that you can change it.
Sometimes it helps to do little things to realize that you are more than your size.
- Ask your friends why they are your friends. Ask your husband why he fell in love with you. Because I guaratee you, they don't see you as their 'fat friend' or 'fat wife.'
- Go out with your friends and have a date night.
- Get out of the pj's and crappy clothes. Splurge on some clothes from Lane Bryant, Torrid, onestopplus.com ... but nice flattering clothes that you can walk out the door in and not feel like a blimp in sweats. It is amazing what a nice outfit can do for you.
- Wear make up.
- Get your hair done!!
- Volunteer for a cause that means something to you. Nothing feels better than giving back.
- Join a yoga class. Yea yea, I can hear all of you laughing. But I joined a yoga class a year ago and it changed my life. Yes, I was the fattest girl there, but I could keep up just fine, could do 99% of the poses, and it made me feel AMAZING. My body changed and got flexible. If you can't afford one, do it at home. Seriously. Yoga is the best.
You have to start somewhere, and getting a headstart on the self-worth first will keep you from epic fails in the future.
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